Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Geezus ima slacker - Picturama!!

Okay, lemme get with it here. First, I have no excuses, I'm just flat-out lame and haven't had the motivation to do all the uploading of pics to this since Sunday. I've got things going on, yea... but it's not that big a deal.

Anyhow. Check this shizzle out. No less a rockstar than
Andy Hampsten himself showed up and pinned a number on for Sunday's Pro/1/2 trip into the Pain Locker. Better check you've packed up a big enough Suitcase O' Courage before you board this train, o yea!

I liked the touch where our man Andy unabashedly rocks the Fredly aesthetic in a tee shirt and tube sox, hucks around a full-suspension MTB with big ol' fatties, spots the bulk of the field ten pounds of bike weight and 20 years in age... and still throws down serious hurt on his rivals.

First lap, Hampsten taking it to all those young punkz out there.

Lemme 'splain something... this guy is not of this earth. I stood within six feet of him on the start line taking pics. The man blew out 42 candles on the old birthday cake this year, and I swear to Dog he doesn't look a day over twenty. I mean he won his big gig back when Madonna still had black roots, belly rolls and a Brooklyn accent... and the absolute BASTARD doesn't even have the decency to be going grey. I had posters of him from his Seven Eleven days on my walls back when I was a teenager (and dinosaurs roamed the earth), and I'm pleased to report that omyGAWD, like, he's hotter than ever!

I adore this picture. I shouldn't have to explain why. Poor Teton here (loud kit, schwanky bike) kinda looks like he's about to puke up a lung.

Okay, okay, enough of me being a giddy groupie. That's 'Sky'Walker Ferguson on the front of this here thundering herd, rocking the o-so-sexxy Primus Mootry / Denver-Boulder Couriers teamkit. Yep, you read that right. An elite cycling team sponsored by a bunch of bike messengers. No wonder they're so freaking stylish. And fast.

This being Colorado, Land Of Anaerobia, it goes without saying there were a ton of classy riders in this field besides just some has-been Giro winner. Heavy representation from the
Front Range Mafia, the Messenger Boyz, and Vaughter's Punkz. Throw in 2 current National Champions, a Cyclocross Worlds silver medallist, and the Colorado and California State Champions, shake, run like hell and watch the pyrotechnics. Kids, this field was as stacked as a three-way catfight between Pam Anderson, Traci Lords and Angelina Jolie.

Check out this gromit, willya? Fifteen years old... holy crap, this wart can't even DRIVE himself to a bike race, and already he's able to make the selection in a Pro/1/2 field. Christ I hate getting old. Where does JV keep finding these punks? It's a conspiracy, man.

At least my buddy Jeff here has the legs to represent for alla us old farts. All you not-twentysomethings reading this here blog, this guy here is your inspiration. Jeff didn't even get serious about cycling until he hit his mid thirties. Talk about your everyman with a day job, who's following his dream and gonna ride it for all it's worth. He is rarely out of the top 10 in these ginormous, talent-ridden Pro/1/2 fields. And 'cross isn't even where his bread is mostly buttered. He's an enduro MTB racer. He just does 'cross cos it's FUN... yea, fun like a double case of the crotch rot, but anyhows.

I was hoarse on Sunday night, whether from yelling or all the dust, I'm not sure.

Oh and Jeff, thanks seriously for helping with the singlespeed project, you are one fine dude. I like yer taste in movies too, bro.

This is just a pretty shot. Of a pretty lad, with pretty legs, riding a pretty bike. Pretty awesome, no?

Another instance of why I sometimes don't delete what look to be screwed up shots. I don't know why, but this one turned out cool despite the blownout background. The pits were kept busy with handups.

The lead group, busting it. It never gets any easier, you just go faster.

Here you go, a little sum'in sum'in from the Women's race. I've no patience for much drivel tonight, so I'll just let the pictures tell the story.

Some really slow chick, she only came in third (but 'cross isn't really her speciality anyhow).

Anne Trombley, former Olympian. She and Katie Compton traded blows for the entire race. Katie rode a really tactical event. Anne attacked way too many times trying to shuck her off her wheel.

This was the last lap, final pair of hurdles, with less than 300 metres to go to the finishline. Anne and Katie were absolutely killing each other, this was a barn burner, and it came down to a tyre width at the sprint.

My bud Marty, hauling arse. I took a bunch of pics of her, and she posted some to her blog. She didn't like this one, I do, so there.

Oh and some shots of the 3s, just cos I like the Swanky's guys.

This is how it's done, folks. Key is to land on your hip, not yer... yeah.

Swanky's has the handsomest teamkit on the Front Range, bar none... I may be biassed towards the maroon and grey scheme, considering I'm a Buckeye by upbringing. Doesn't hurt that these guys also rock the trucker girls logo on their buttpanels as well. Scha-wanky!

That's all folks!




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